WAYNE'S WORLD OF CINEMA: ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969)

According to Biographer Paul Green, before SIGNING to STAR in ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969), Jennifer Jones attempted to commit suicide by jumping off a cliff of Malibu Hills after hearing a close friend died of a blood infection. Jones was hospitalized and in a coma, then eventually recovered from the failed suicide attempt.

Once Jennifer Jones agreed to STAR in ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969) she immediately became apart of " Trash Yourself Cinema", following the FOOTSTEPS of such ALUMNI as Mae West in MYRA BREKINRIDGE (1970) and Lana Turner in THE BIG CUBE (1969). One has to wonder WHY a five-time Academy nominee like Jennifer Jones ended up doing such a CRUEL and VULGAR project.

SYNOPSIS (Spoilers Alert !!!!)
Our minor Cult Film begins with the camera panning inside the Master's suite. following the trail of SCATTERED CLOTHES to outside the SHOWER where TWO MEN are revealed SHOWERING together. At once a narrative of Tara Nicole can be heard informing everyone that her PARENTS WERE PERFECT and that her FATHER is NOT a HOMOSEXUAL. She goes on to say that her father was SHEIK and was ADORN by all women. But Tara knows better because it was she who DISCOVERED her father and his friend when she was a little girl. Tara pictures her father Willie Steele ( Charles Aidman) in her dreams as the PERFECT FATHER but in reality, he's a CLOSETED HOMOSEXUAL and ABSENTEE father.

As for Tara's mother, Astrid Steele ( Jennifer Jones ) she pictures her as CINDERELLA and SLEEPING BEAUTY wrapped into one. Also in Tara's dreams, her mother was the PERFECT MOTHER, However, in reality, Astrid was a former PORNO STAR who appeared in 30 stag (X-RATED) films, before she met Tara's wealthy father. Tara continued to say that her father would SHOWER her mother with JEWELS and more JEWELS because she loved them more than anything even her family.

Poor Tara Steele did not have the FAIRY TALE childhood she dreams of. In fact, she grew up away from her LESS than PERFECT PARENTS, abroad in SWITZERLAND at a FINISHING SCHOOL for young ladies. Now at eighteen, Tara was coming home to stay.

Astrid wondered if her daughter Tara will be PRETTIER when she arrives home after years abroad at Finishing School. Tara's father assures his wife that their daughter will be FATTER, not PRETTIER. Nevertheless, Astrid wants to give her daughter the biggest COMING OUT PARTY ever. She plans to have Yves Laurent fix her and Sydney Guilaroff does her makeup and her hair. Astrid rambles on wanting to invite all the young people including NANCY SINATRA and of course MAMAS AND PAPAS. Astrid thinks MAMA CASS will make Tara feel more COMFORTABLE about her size.

After the MAKEOVER, Tara felt more INSECURE than ever hoping that her mother had waited until she DROPPED 75lbs before giving her a COMING OUT PARTY. The OVERWEIGHT HEIRESS runs to the bathroom to SLASH her WRIST with a RAZORBLADE. However, the OVERWEIGHT HEIRESS decides against taking her life and applies a bandage over the cut. She then tries to wrap a string of pearls over her wrist to conceal the bandage.

Things go SOUR when Daddy comes to tell to his OVERWEIGHT HEIRESS how BEAUTIFUL she looks. But Tara not buying it for one second, in fact, she knows she looks FAT AND DOPEY. Then the OVERWEIGHT HEIRESS decides to take her shortcomings out on dear old daddy for throwing this party for her mother can show her latest EXPENSIVE JEWELRY and latest DESIGNER GOWN under the DISGUISE of her COMING OUT. Tara goes under the attack stating that her mother was a CIGARETTE GIRL when her father met her and said "That must have been one hell of a pack of cigarettes she sold you. One PUFF and your PRIVATE PARTS went up in SMOKE ." Daddy retaliates with a WALLOP across his disrespectable daughter's face.

Suddenly Astrid appears in the doorway, wearing her new necklace and a designer gown. Tara is speechless about how BEAUTIFUL her mother looks. Unfortunately, Tara's mother starts to zero in on how Tara not measuring up. Less than thrilled with her daughter 's Coiffure, Astrid DISMANTLES the creation, stripping away the WIGLETS leaving a more simple FAIRY TALE PRINCESS hairdo. Astrid senses that her daughter is less than thrilled about her COMING OUT celebration and ADMITS that the party is more her. Tara agrees to make the best of it after her mother vows to never do it again.

Coming down the STAIRCASE like a FAIRY TALE PRINCESS, Tara was immediately drawn to the STRANGE VIBRATIONS of sound coming from the STAGE. She drew nearer to the stage, like in a TRANCE, becoming more ENCHANTED with a VISION in TIGHT LEATHER PANTS. The vision was certainly not MAMA CASS, instead, it was a JIM MORRISON wannabe. He was SHIRTLESS and commanded the stage with the film's theme song. The OVERWEIGHT HEIRESS was so overcome that she became FASCINATED with his crotch. Feeling GUILTY about her sinful desires, Tara runs off.

Tara immediately runs to the DESSERT TABLE cramming DECADENT pastries down her throat. High on SUGAR, Tara makes a beeline out of her party, only to be almost RUNDOWN by the VISION IN TIGHT PANTS. After a very brief conversation, Tara accepts a ride with VISION IN TIGHT PANTS. He then informs Tara that he can't stand parties for FAT GIRLS and his name is Bogart Peter Stuyvesant (Jordan Christopher). After telling Tara, she was a LOSER and she'd NEVER been had. Bogart takes her to a secluded area for some alone time. Following some PASSIONATE kissing, Bogart INFORMS Tara that her BREATH STINKS but he DIGS IT. Before long the naive OVERWEIGHT HEIRESS is no longer a VIRGIN.

Next, Tara meets Bogart's followers Santoro ( Roddy Mcdowell) Joe (Lou Rawls) and Anna Livia ( Davey Davidson) which leads to some partying. Tara finds herself at the center of attraction while her new boyfriend sings "Hip, Hip For Hurray for FAT" and she dances. After the party, Bogart wants Tara to take him and his gang SKYDIVING because she's an underage unknown pilot. Tara soon finds out that her Prince Charming is not so charming after he slaps her down for being apart of the UPPER-CLASS society. Bogart's true colors are shown when he starts boast of American imperialism, and screw anyone who hates killing.

Meanwhile back at the mansion, Astrid wants to file a MISSING PERSON on her daughter. However, Daddy wants to keep it UNDER THE RADAR with private detectives. Astrid can't imagine who would want her daughter. Daddy quickly answers that Tara is worth a HALF A BILLION DOLLARS.

Tara is soon returned home to her PERFECT PARENTS. It comes quite apparent that it's not RANSOM that Bogart is after. It's much more personal like DESTROYING A WEALTHY FAMILY. Bogart invites Astrid to his recording studio only to INSULT her with his new song about her entitled MOTHER LOVER. This sends the material-obsessed matriarch to the exit door utters venomous words to her daughter on her way out. " You are a FAT GIRL, you idiot. I don't know why anyone who even touches you. "

Bogart makes his moves on Tara's mother. Astrid ACCEPTS his ADVANCES forgetting about the appalling song he wrote about her. It seems that Astrid has no problem STABBING her daughter in the back to sleep with her boyfriend away. Only thinking of her own selfish needs, Astrid has sex with Bogart, not knowing that she is playing in the HANDS OF THE DEVIL.

After the sex, Bogart INFORMS the matriarch about some RUMORS stating that she had SLEPT with the whole town. Astrid answers " The ones that say they haven't. "
Then for a bit of folly, Bogart decides to SHAKEDOWN the matriarch by running about the house with her PRICELESS NECKLACE. Suddenly Bogart's friend joins in keeping the PRICELESS NECKLACE away from the matriarch. No longer able to stand the CHILDISH PRANK, Astrid breaks down to tears at her daughter's feet. When Tara was handed the PRICELESS NECKLACE, instead of handing back to her mother. Tara caressed them against her face, too high with on party favors to care about her sobbing mother.

After a while, Astrid decides to go SKYDIVING with Bogart and his followers. Once she JUMPED out of the plane, Astrid realizes she made a GRAVE mistake. Astrid could see the others PASSING her PRICELESS NECKLACE to each other. Horrified that they would DROP it, Astrid FLIES over to the group. Bogart hands the matriarch her PRICELESS NECKLACE.

After being handed the necklace, Astrid found herself FALLING at a FAST pace that she could no longer see the others. FASTER and FASTER, Astrid kept PLUNGING towards the earth. Astrid desperately kept PULLING on the CORD, yet the PARACHUTE would not open. Clinging to her necklace worth millions, Astrid becomes aware that is all she will be taking with her to the NEXT LIFE. A token from a 20-year marriage to a man she despised. The same marriage that produced her overweight daughter that she was ashamed of. In a MATTER OF SECONDS, it was all over for Astrid Steele when she hit the ground.

Leaving Astrid's Funeral, Bogart makes it clear to the GRIEVING WIDOWER that he is there to CONSOLE him. Bogart has a TWINKLE in his eye as he CARESSES Willy Steele's leg up and down. Tara couldn't believe her eyes to what Bogart was suggesting to her father. Once again tears flowed down Tara 's face because Bogart has now being tossed her aside for her father.

Bogart accomplished his agenda DESTROYING an UPPER-CLASS Family by SLEEPING with each one. And then Bogart revealed his DARKER SIDE when it was too late. Bogart PRESENTED Astrid a FAULTY parachute which resulted in her death. As for the Patriarch, Willy Steele, Bogart made him suffer for being the King of the Industrial Jungle. Bogart beat Willy to death, while in the midst of heated passion.

The finale has the OVERWEIGHT HEIRESS not coping well with the loss of her PERFECT PARENTS. A reality to harsh for Tara to bare. She begins to lose touch with REALITY, returning back to her DREAM WORLD where FAT GIRLS are ACCEPTED.

FILM FACTS

ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969) is also known as

CULT OF THE DAMNED (1969).

Jeanne Crain was offered the role of Astrid Steele in ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969) but turned it down.

ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969) was the first film that Jennifer Jones made after her suicide attempt.

Roddy McDowall was 40 years old and Singer Lou Rawls was 35, both trying to represent the younger generation. Rawls made his big-screen debut in ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969).

Holly Near made her screen debut in ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO(1969). But Near's claim to fame is more that of Folk Singer / Song Writer than an Actress.

ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969) had performed poorly at the box office on its initial release, so the studio to release it under another title. Hoping to cash in the Manson Murders hysteria that transpired around the same time, the film was re-issued under the title called CULT OF THE DAMNED (1969). Nonetheless, the new title didn't help boost ticket sales.

The Beverly Hills Mansion used in ANGEL, ANGEL, DOWN WE GO (1969) once belonged to Actress Marion Davies.

Jordan Christopher 's most recognized role of his film career is that of the menacing, narcissistic rock star in this obscure Cult Film: ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969). Christopher died of a heart attack at age 55 in 1996.

IMMORTAL DIALOGUE

" In my heart of hearts, I'm a SEXUAL CLAM !!!"

" Astrid, you have all the MANNERS of the GUTTER. Of
a Prize Blue Ribbon Pig ! "

Bogart: "Wow. Your BREATH STINKS. Your BREATH STINKS!"

Tara: "Oh, please!"

Bogart: "No no no no no. I DIG IT. I DIG IT!"

Astrid : (to her Masseuse) " Stop it, Hopkins, you're HURTING me. You BLOODY SADISTIC DYKE ."

Astrid : " I made 30 STAG films and never FAKED an ORGASM!"

   Astrid: " Do you want me or do you want my daughter? "
   Bogart: "Are they mutually exclusive? "
   Astrid: "There's a word for you, but I don't think I even know what it is."

FABRICATED DIALOGUE

"Cheer up darling, you'll be TWO - FACED like everyone else at the party !!!"

" After I take this CRAP off, I better be the FAIREST one at the party"

" What kind of MUSHROOMS were those? "

" How in the hell, did I get talked into doing this picture ?"

" Hey Everybody, I think I can see ALASKA up here !!!!

THE CAST:
Jennifer Jones (Astrid Steele), Jordan Christopher (Bogart Peter Stuyvesant), Holly Near (Tara Steele), Roddy McDowell (Santaro),
Lou Rawls (Joe), Charles Aidman (Willy Steele), Marty Britt (Matre D), Danielle Aubin ( Pauline), Sandrine Gobet (Tara at 3), Joan Calhoun ( Tara at 8), Rudy Battaglia (Tony), George Ostro (Rudolph).

MY BOTTOM LINE ...
ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969) is pure cinema trash in its authentic form. This cult film is embodied with cruel and vulgar dialogue. Possibly one of the worst scripts ever written. ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969) follows in the veins of MYRA BRECKINRIDGE (1970) using added footage for the main character's inner thoughts. Lurid collages are used to express Tara's most intimate reflections.

ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969) is a psychedelic mind trip about the darker side of youth rebellion in the late '60s. Jordan Christopher plays a narcissistic ROCK SINGER named Bogart Christopher Stuyvesant with a negative political agenda. Bogart's mission is to spread the negative philosophy boasting of revolution, violence, killing, and war. He's a dark prince fashioned with a twist of Charles Manson.

Talk about a Leading Lady being in a film so far beneath her. Jennifer Jones is one brave actress. Why this five-time Oscar-nominated Actress would want to involve in this sordid venture, is certainly beyond me. Jones plays Astrid Steele, mother to her unwanted overweight daughter and wife to a gay Industrialist. Jones is quite convincing in the role of Materialistic Matriarch. However, the dialogue is another story. Lines like " In my heart of hearts, I'm a sexual clam." or " I made 30 stag films and I never faked an orgasm." One doesn't know how to feel after viewing this cult film. Whether to feel embarrassment for Jones or applaud her for her bravery.

My final thought on ANGEL, ANGEL DOWN WE GO (1969) is a
product from " When Hollywood Lost its Mind" period. The time span of the late 60's to the early '70s that turned out schlock after shlock. After being renamed as CULT OF THE DAMNED (1969), vertically disappeared in obscurity. This trainwreck is worth going off the rails for curiosity. This Cult Film is filled with delirious bad dialogue tailor-made for the connoisseurs of Cinema Trash.